Ways to Support ♥️ - updated 09-JULY

Real talk, there is no blueprint on how to go about supporting someone going through something like this. What to say, if anything at all, or how to help if you feel compelled.

First and foremost, (not that you need it, but in case you do) you have permission to not say or do anything at all. I’ve been there and have felt guilt over it but now that I’m here facing the other side - if you aren’t sure what to say or how to say it - it’s all gravy baby. I love you. We good. ♥️

If you find yourself wondering what we need, what you can do, and you want to offer support but aren’t sure how or what, here are some things that could be helpful.

~~ Please note: NONE of the following is an explicit ask for anything - just some guidance/inspo for those who have been asking. ~~

** 09- JULY UPDATE **  

Chemo is complete, ya’ll! Now we move into surgeries, radiation, and more immunotherapy. Meals are still a huge help. I expect you’ll start to see and hear from J and I more socially as my energy returns and my wbc improve, so don’t skip on the bbq and picnic invites! Otherwise any bodywork recommendations - massage, workout classes, acupuncture, whatever ya love that you think I should know about - are welcome and will be helpful as I heal from chemo and surgeries! ♥️  

🫂♥️ STAYING CONNECTED : not all support needs to be practical to cancer care and treatment. Show or give love in ways that feel authentic to you. Share your passions - maybe art or cooking. Let’s catch up - have a game or movie night, take a walk, or have some dinner. Just do it - show up (but ask before hand if we are home/available), stay for a little or awhile. If you need our address for any reason, reach out to me or Jeremy directly.

🥙MEALS: Healthy and wholesome homemade meals or delivery/meal service gift cards will be put to good use as we navigate new routines, symptoms, surgeries, and the inevitable emotional toll of it all.

• Maven Meals [local company that does food preparation and delivery], Uber, Grubhub, DoorDash are all good options for gift cards  (use email: vanessa.pautler@gmail.com). If we have any credits left over at the end of all this (whenever that is) I will work to donate them to anyone else in need.
• Be Yoga Burien hosted Meal Train : This meal train was started by our loving local Be Yoga Burien community. In about 4 weeks I will post another Meal Train page administered by some dear friends that will be accessible to our wider community of friends and family.
  

🧞‍♂️📝AMAZON WISH LIST: there are some creature comforts that will help make the treatment journey more comfortable or combat side effects of treatment. This list serves as a personal catchall for items I may purchase but sharing here in case tangible items is how some folks prefer to provide support. I expect this list to evolve over time as treatment progresses: V’s BC treatment treasures Amazon wishlist. 

** 09-JULY UPDATE ** 

I will add to this list as I figure out what might be helpful in the coming stages. Right now, I’m not totally sure!

 
I will keep this post up to date as things change. I have deep love and admiration for all of you. Thank you endlessly.

Love,

V