Nearly through the thick of it
Chemo ✅
Double mastectomy ✅
Expanders ✅ (tomorrow)
Immunotherapy scheduled
Radiation plan TBD
Double mastectomy ✅
Expanders ✅ (tomorrow)
Immunotherapy scheduled
Radiation plan TBD
Reconstruction date TBD
Things are happening and there is much to report!
My skin sparring double mastectomy on Aug. 1st went well and I’ve been recovering nicely. Here’s how things went:
Pre-OP
I met with my plastic surgeon, the day before (7/31) so he could mark where he wanted my Surgeon to cut according to the type of reconstruction we are planning. We talked through what to expect for the expander surgery, having expanders in general, and the process for gradually expanding the expanders ðĪŠ. We also talked through the timeline of reconstruction where I learned I won’t be able to get reconstruction until 6 months after radiation ends.
Later that night (and the morning of surgery) I had to wash with a special soap that removes microbes from my skin to help minimize risk of infection.
Mastectomy Surgery Day
August 1st, I checked in for surgery at 8:15am and first step was getting a radioactive dye injected around my left (the cancer side) areola. This dye migrates to and stains the closest lymph nodes (the ones targeted for removal and testing) so they can be easily seen on the ultrasound imaging used during the surgery.
As I laid down on the table, the tech outlined out the procedure and her process which was 4 injections of this radio active dye around the areola. I thought, “Surely, I’ll get some lidocaine to numb?…”. No. Nope. Just 4 painful (albeit quick) injections. Probably one of the most painful moments of this whole cancer journey and highlighted the reality that surgery was imminent. I started to cry and the very sweet tech told me my reaction was warranted for the scenario. She shared with me that 20-odd years ago her mother had breast cancer and without being able to see and test specific nodes, they took all the nodes on the side of the cancer - which all tested negative. So yeah, definitely happy I am living in this timeline with this technology so I can hopefully keep as many lymph nodes as possible. From there we walked up to surgery.
Prep for surgery included a pee in a cup, signing consent forms, full body wipe down with some special cloths, quick chat with my surgeon confirming our plans, and hug and a kiss goodbye to Jeremy. As I rolled into surgery I did my best to not look around too much at all the things (machines, tools) and people around me. Once the Anesthesiologist said he was giving me the goods - *snap* I was out.
Immediately after surgery
Next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery. Surgery was about 4.5 hours (about an hour under the estimated time) and everything went smoothly. I had the option of going home or staying the night at the hospital and I opted to stay the night so I could have the time to adjust and be supported by all the medical staff. I spoke with my Surgeon the next morning and learned that the sentinel and axillary lymph nodes they took came back negative for cancer - this is literally THE BEST case scenario and I’m so happy for this outcome. More on the final pathology below.
The nurses showed Jeremy and I how to care for the two draining tubes and instructions for pain management before heading home (8/2).
Post-Op
First few days at home went well. I have two draining tubes, one on each side. I have to sleep sitting up and while I really miss laying down completely, sleeping sitting up isn’t as bad as I thought it might be.
The Monday (8/5) after surgery the bandages came off and I could finally see what was underneath and take a much needed shower. I cried through the entire shower while Jeremy helped me wash. It was shocking, and tragic, and traumatic, and sad, and shocking, and sad.. to see the concave pockets in my chest, the drop off edge where my chest ends and where my breast tissue used to be, being and feeling deformed. You have to allow yourself to feel all of it in order to move through it on to the other side and in that moment the feelings were big and sad.
Over the next few days the shock softened and my belief of the fact that this form is temporary set in, and the gaze of my minds eye turned forward.
Next up is expander surgery and soon I’ll have some Toobs (temporary boobs ðĪ).
Recovery
Overall recovery from this surgery has felt pretty smooth and on track. The skin on my chest is healing nicely but is pretty much numb to the touch, along with the back of my left arm (the side they took the lymph nodes from). Recently I’ve been having a lot of nerve sensation across my chest which I’m guessing is nerve regeneration. The draining tubes have really been the most painful/annoying part. My left side is chill, but the one on my right side is angry and hurty. Being cooped up and physically limited is humbling but I’m just trying to stay easy, do what I can, and not push it.
Final Pathology
The final pathology report confirmed the lymph nodes removed and tested were negative for cancer. Overall I responded really well to chemo and there was just 9mm of the cancerous tumor left (down from 3cm). This means chemo melted more than 95% of the tumor and surgery removed the rest. Great news all the way around.
So, what’s next?
First, expander surgery (8/15). I am a little nervous because I’ve been told expanders are uncomfortable, especially before they are filled. When they are filled they are hard, and sit like rocks on the chest since there is no fat or breast tissue to soften things… and I’ll have them for more than 6 months. So I’m hoping I tolerate them ok.
After expander surgery I’ll have a post op with my mastectomy surgeon (8/20), and then a post op with my plastic surgeon the following week (8/28) where they will likely do the initial fill to the expanders. Expanders help keep my skin pliable and maintain the breast pocket while I go through radiation, which can cause skin to thicken and contract. They will continue to be slowly expanded through radiation and the 6 months leading up to reconstructive surgery.
I have an appointment with the radiation folks later on the same day as my plastic surgery post-op (8/28). During that appointment I’ll learn how many radiation sessions I’ll need and we will do all the planning and mapping needed for those radiation sessions.
And finally, I am slated for 9 infusions of immunotherapy (once every 3 weeks) starting on 8/26. Just like radiation, the immunotherapy will help my body attack any microscopic cancer cells that may be left in my body. Immunotherapy will take me through February and it looks like reconstruction will land sometime next spring. My hope had been that I could get reconstruction within this calendar year mainly to just get on with all of it - it’s a lot!! But now that I’ve had time to sit with it and after having my mastectomy surgery, I am looking forward to having some months of normalcy. Time to heal my body from chemo, mastectomy, and radiation. Energy to have some adventures and get back to the things and people I love. Space to rebuild my strength and prepare my mind and body for reconstruction. It’s disappointing having to wait but ultimately a silver lining.
It does kind of feel like I’m nearly through the thick of it. Every step of the way my husband Jeremy has been my life raft, my light, my hero. Our “for better or for worse” vows have been put to task and every day he is beside me as we move through the dark together. I am lucky to know a love like this.
More soon!
Love,
V♥️
Things are happening and there is much to report!
My skin sparring double mastectomy on Aug. 1st went well and I’ve been recovering nicely. Here’s how things went:
Pre-OP
I met with my plastic surgeon, the day before (7/31) so he could mark where he wanted my Surgeon to cut according to the type of reconstruction we are planning. We talked through what to expect for the expander surgery, having expanders in general, and the process for gradually expanding the expanders ðĪŠ. We also talked through the timeline of reconstruction where I learned I won’t be able to get reconstruction until 6 months after radiation ends.
Later that night (and the morning of surgery) I had to wash with a special soap that removes microbes from my skin to help minimize risk of infection.
Mastectomy Surgery Day
August 1st, I checked in for surgery at 8:15am and first step was getting a radioactive dye injected around my left (the cancer side) areola. This dye migrates to and stains the closest lymph nodes (the ones targeted for removal and testing) so they can be easily seen on the ultrasound imaging used during the surgery.
As I laid down on the table, the tech outlined out the procedure and her process which was 4 injections of this radio active dye around the areola. I thought, “Surely, I’ll get some lidocaine to numb?…”. No. Nope. Just 4 painful (albeit quick) injections. Probably one of the most painful moments of this whole cancer journey and highlighted the reality that surgery was imminent. I started to cry and the very sweet tech told me my reaction was warranted for the scenario. She shared with me that 20-odd years ago her mother had breast cancer and without being able to see and test specific nodes, they took all the nodes on the side of the cancer - which all tested negative. So yeah, definitely happy I am living in this timeline with this technology so I can hopefully keep as many lymph nodes as possible. From there we walked up to surgery.
Prep for surgery included a pee in a cup, signing consent forms, full body wipe down with some special cloths, quick chat with my surgeon confirming our plans, and hug and a kiss goodbye to Jeremy. As I rolled into surgery I did my best to not look around too much at all the things (machines, tools) and people around me. Once the Anesthesiologist said he was giving me the goods - *snap* I was out.
Immediately after surgery
Next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery. Surgery was about 4.5 hours (about an hour under the estimated time) and everything went smoothly. I had the option of going home or staying the night at the hospital and I opted to stay the night so I could have the time to adjust and be supported by all the medical staff. I spoke with my Surgeon the next morning and learned that the sentinel and axillary lymph nodes they took came back negative for cancer - this is literally THE BEST case scenario and I’m so happy for this outcome. More on the final pathology below.
The nurses showed Jeremy and I how to care for the two draining tubes and instructions for pain management before heading home (8/2).
Post-Op
First few days at home went well. I have two draining tubes, one on each side. I have to sleep sitting up and while I really miss laying down completely, sleeping sitting up isn’t as bad as I thought it might be.
The Monday (8/5) after surgery the bandages came off and I could finally see what was underneath and take a much needed shower. I cried through the entire shower while Jeremy helped me wash. It was shocking, and tragic, and traumatic, and sad, and shocking, and sad.. to see the concave pockets in my chest, the drop off edge where my chest ends and where my breast tissue used to be, being and feeling deformed. You have to allow yourself to feel all of it in order to move through it on to the other side and in that moment the feelings were big and sad.
Over the next few days the shock softened and my belief of the fact that this form is temporary set in, and the gaze of my minds eye turned forward.
Next up is expander surgery and soon I’ll have some Toobs (temporary boobs ðĪ).
Recovery
Overall recovery from this surgery has felt pretty smooth and on track. The skin on my chest is healing nicely but is pretty much numb to the touch, along with the back of my left arm (the side they took the lymph nodes from). Recently I’ve been having a lot of nerve sensation across my chest which I’m guessing is nerve regeneration. The draining tubes have really been the most painful/annoying part. My left side is chill, but the one on my right side is angry and hurty. Being cooped up and physically limited is humbling but I’m just trying to stay easy, do what I can, and not push it.
Final Pathology
The final pathology report confirmed the lymph nodes removed and tested were negative for cancer. Overall I responded really well to chemo and there was just 9mm of the cancerous tumor left (down from 3cm). This means chemo melted more than 95% of the tumor and surgery removed the rest. Great news all the way around.
So, what’s next?
First, expander surgery (8/15). I am a little nervous because I’ve been told expanders are uncomfortable, especially before they are filled. When they are filled they are hard, and sit like rocks on the chest since there is no fat or breast tissue to soften things… and I’ll have them for more than 6 months. So I’m hoping I tolerate them ok.
After expander surgery I’ll have a post op with my mastectomy surgeon (8/20), and then a post op with my plastic surgeon the following week (8/28) where they will likely do the initial fill to the expanders. Expanders help keep my skin pliable and maintain the breast pocket while I go through radiation, which can cause skin to thicken and contract. They will continue to be slowly expanded through radiation and the 6 months leading up to reconstructive surgery.
I have an appointment with the radiation folks later on the same day as my plastic surgery post-op (8/28). During that appointment I’ll learn how many radiation sessions I’ll need and we will do all the planning and mapping needed for those radiation sessions.
And finally, I am slated for 9 infusions of immunotherapy (once every 3 weeks) starting on 8/26. Just like radiation, the immunotherapy will help my body attack any microscopic cancer cells that may be left in my body. Immunotherapy will take me through February and it looks like reconstruction will land sometime next spring. My hope had been that I could get reconstruction within this calendar year mainly to just get on with all of it - it’s a lot!! But now that I’ve had time to sit with it and after having my mastectomy surgery, I am looking forward to having some months of normalcy. Time to heal my body from chemo, mastectomy, and radiation. Energy to have some adventures and get back to the things and people I love. Space to rebuild my strength and prepare my mind and body for reconstruction. It’s disappointing having to wait but ultimately a silver lining.
It does kind of feel like I’m nearly through the thick of it. Every step of the way my husband Jeremy has been my life raft, my light, my hero. Our “for better or for worse” vows have been put to task and every day he is beside me as we move through the dark together. I am lucky to know a love like this.
More soon!
Love,
V♥️
Dear, just by reading it feels so much is going on and I can only imagine how you are handling everything with a positive attitude ❤️ðĪ. This will also pass and I am looking forward to see you someday at the same restaurant that we met last ❤️. All the best wishes for your speedy recovery ð. I love you and cheering for you from this side ❤️
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